Mr. Williams

Brian Williams has kind of stolen my heart. I was listening to Q this morning and he was a guest. He is so thoughtful and cool and at one point it was casually brought up that he has a website called Britunes. What!? I didn't think this guy could get any more rad, but I was mistaken. He is so boss. Check out his website (chuckle, I love it!): Britunes
Spoiler!: He has pretty great taste in music.

Lost Fans Unite!

Suddenly everything serious seems so funny. 

See more cartoons by Graham Annable here: Flickr Album.

Hump Day: Let's Get Juxtaposed

a few things:

(a) sorry about my lack of posting - you know, exams and such

(b) Wisdom from my Get in Touch with Your Inner Buddha book (one of my most prized possessions):

"It's often best to start at the - beginning except when something begins at 6 a.m."

(c) Am officially obsessed with Damages 

(d) Snow! Snow! Snow!

(e) This and This: "Go-ing up and down the bridge/ Play-ing scrabble in the graveyard"

(f) Off to write my first exam, wish me luck!

Noel and (Satsuma) La Roux

Satsuma La Roux, as voiced by Noel Fielding, is kinda 100 times better than real life La roux, no? The music is still awe-some either way.

SNL: ZZZZzzzz

Ugh. Watching SNL last night I couldn't help but think to myself; remember when SNL was somewhat tolerable? Yeah, tolerable. I am nowhere near old enough to remember when SNL was excellent or even good - I am part of a generation that knows SNL as the show that sometimes has special cameos during Weekend Update, when Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon basically salvaged whatever there was to salvage of the show. Now that they are gone and Tina is no longer a writer, watching the show has become increasingly uncomfortable and much like a televised awards show: Actors read their lines uncomfortably while making the lamest small chat and jokes (which they know are terrible making the delivery 10x worse) and the audience tunes in for the first 1/2 hour, 45 minutes if they are really into masochism, and then groan and switch channels or as the case may be - go to bed. Besides the unstoppable downhill roll SNL has found itself in for some years now, last night was a particularly poor showing for the following reasons:

1 - Am I the ONLY person who finds January Jones' total lack of acting ability troubling given the attention she's received for Mad Men? Also - did that show's season not just end? Why in the world was she hosting? - snooze. The whole Deer in the Headlights look was understandale for the first 30 seconds of her monologue but after that it just got sad. Then it got irritating. Then I turned off my T.V.
2 - I heart Grace Kelly; If you are going to do a sketch about her at least try and make it intelligent funny - not 12 year old boy funny *fart*
3 - Just because she's famous and on a psuedopopular television show does not mean she should be hosting SNL. If ya ain't got the chops you shouldn't have the job.

In all fairness - Ms. Jones did have a tough act to follow - last week's SNL was surprisingly entertaining even if I didn't collapse in giggles, I did smirk often and Taylor was fabulous. Perhaps the weeks should have been reversed?
The sad thing is that it just does not seem to be getting better - ever. The only entertaining and in fact memorable bits of SNL from the past couple of years have been the Digital Shorts - and those aren't even live. I still go back and watching my favourites - like Lazy Sunday or Jonah Hill Dates Andy's Dad (which I watched last night on youtube only to find it removed from the site this morning!) - priceless ... but not enough to save this show I'm afraid. What they DO need is some original and funny recurring characters that younger viewers can get behind. Other than that, I'm at a loss.

Tears of a Rapper

I know this delayed, but it seems as if the whole internet is okay with inflating this Kanye West Gate thing into an internet phenomenon and as such - meme, so I figure it's okay if I just add my own little patch to the quilt of it. I am over it, I was over it the day after it happened - I think everyone else should be too, but looking at some of these clever little pictures makes me giggle and I am not ashamed. Watching that clip of Kanye on Leno (awful and at points I felt exploitative and inappropriate) made me think immediately of the perpetually jovial Flight of the Conchords and their Hurt Feelings, please enjoy with some of my favourite creations as a result of Kanye-Gate 2009... and remember kids ... rappers are vincible.

Welcome to My Nightmare

I Lurv Gaga, buuuuuuut..... this is image will haunt my nightmares tonight:

ROBBED!

JARED JARED JARED *fan girl drool*

He took that unforgiveable loss to Greenday VERY well

Aww Ms. Swift

=( I have this love/hate relationship with Kanye West but he messed with the WRONG GIRL - Taylor is my homegirl and I do not support that shit! I have the HATES in a major way right now - seriously wiped a tear from my eye - my hand was all shaky and ridiculousness! Kanye, how could ya be so HEARTLESS (see what I did there?)

ps. where are my Kings - if they're there they best be cutting to them now ... ooh rock video awa-JARED?! *squeels*

VMAs 2009: Thoughts-on-the-Fly

Okay so not a real live blog, just my thoughts ... as they pop into my head

First Up

Are pink and Shakira wearing the Same Dress?!

O.M.G. Lady Gaga - Amazing - I am so excited for her to kick ass! (please don't let me down)

Did Buzz Aldrin say: "G-narls Barkely"???

If it's not Taylor Swift in that carriage I am gonna smack someone.

AAden: Aw Hells No Photo pt. 2

Can YOU spot AAden?!Right you are: he is, of course the one who looks as if he has just broken out into a swift run as he is about to flee this circus for greener pastures ... oh if only that great big fence weren't in the way! better luck next time chap.

....

And now, let's take a moment to examine the subjects of this charming family photo ....BY NUMBERS! It looks like the Gosselins have opened up their very own petting zoo of some sort - and it's not hard to see why...1) Here we have a girl who has stopped by the Gosselin petting zoo and thoughtfully brought some candy and trivial pursuit cards (obvs for AAden) to lure the children closer.

2) Jon Gosselin's next fling, sorry, "girlfriend", sorry, NANNY.

3) Pedo - hard to spot without the trademark glasses, but just as dangerous...

4) What no Ed Hardy, Jon?! Is the world ending, the sky falling? or maybe he just hasn't done laundry in a while...

5) Not actually Gosselin children - "stunt doubles" the real girls are in their trailers .. they only do magazine shoots now, earning most of their doe by selling family secrets to to tabloids.

6) ..... the "special" one, probably Joel.

Special Delivery Courtesy of Gaga Post pt. Deux

How did I miss this gold nugget of a performance at the MMVA's by GAGA?! Oh right - I gots no tv at the home place.

Question: where can I buy one of those sparkler bra/corset things - they crazy.

AAden: Aw Hells No Photo

Today I spent an actual-factual full day working my buns off doing finance stuff, so when I got home naturally I wanted to denumb my brain by looking on my trashy gossip websites. And what do I find?! These unintentionally hilarious shots of all the Gosselins playing nice .... well almost all. No surprise, the resident sourpuss, too-cool-for-school, all around "bitch, please" member of the troupe, AAden, was doing his best "I am NOT here" poses for the cameras. But you can't fool me AAden - I've used green, sorry: apple, coloured arrows to point this little him (trying to get out of the shots) out.

I'll give him props for his craftiness though .... examples:

AAden's Hat:

You know he's hiding a makeshift shank under that thing...

AAden's version of Eff Off


AAden's ability to play it cool with strangers:
Helps him make connections to the criminal underground of Pennsylvania or wherever the hell he lives.


He Know's how to get what he wants:
I'm pretty sure this is how he spends most of his days - lying on the couch, feigning illness to incite fights between his sisters.

My Life as a Mad (wo)Man

I inteded for this post to be a somewhat researched and thoughtful look at the show Mad Men. I just finished watching the first season and I'm not nearly as enthralled by it as the rest of the world seems to be. In fact, I find much of the show quite dull. Yet, for whatever reason (probably sheer boredom) I continue to watch it. So I googled a bit and found this most amusing Mad Men Yourself setup on their website.

I'd bet the the show would be a helluva lot more interesting if I was on it! And I am ready to prove it. The following is a list of reasons I'd be the perfect addition to the Mad Men cast:

_____________________________________________

I would not stand for sexist judgements on my fashion choice:
"WHAT is everyone laughing at?! What is it? Is it my awkward houndstooth getup?! - Okay, well I'll have you know it's fashionable and lets people know I'm serious about work. No, not that? ohhhh - my actual-factual bee hive hat is blocking the projector again? oh how hilarious .... NOT - grow up boys."

I would drink martinis with Don Draper while wearing a mink stole:

Nothing says progressive-thinking, career-oriented lady like martinis and a mink stole. That and painting the town with your friends husband.

I would be selectively "honest" with my Frenemies, a much undervalued trait:

"Ugh. Betty, this coffee is foul. Good thing I've got my cigarette to cure that awful taste. And by the way, who did you're kitchen ... It's so ... so ... well so interesting" *snicker* (like the chocolate)

I would show the other office ladies (Miss Hollaway I'm looking at you) how it's done in the workplace:

Bee's Hive hair, conservative green dress with a not so conservative fit, newspaper for cred and a thumbs up for myself and my self-esteem.

In fact ... I would be the Boss Lady offering challenging projects and positive encouragement to my underlings:

"Type, Peggy, tyyyyyyyppppeeee! What? You've got nothing to type? Here - transpose this day old newspaper .... I said TRANSPOSE Peggy, trasnposeeeeeeee as if you life depended on it. ...And stop fooling around with that pansy, gross, richboy Campbell - vom."

I would be OK with picnicing in central park on my own:

*sings* Saturday! In the park, I think it was the fourth of Julyyyyy! Oh. That song hasn't been made yet? Oh, okay, that's cool, that's cool. .... MAN I HATE THE 60s!!!! (And by the by, how awful is this picture?!: a) apparently I don't have friends to picnic with b) I'm totally not wearing proper attire c) I am the messiest eater everrrr and d) I play chess by myself for fun - sad.)

And finally, I would be down with being my true self behind closed doors ...

i.e. chainsmoking - cigarette in mouth 'n hand, champagne for one and no I don't have my weave in - deal.

_______________________________________________

Guess Who?

"I've always liked motorcycles and cars and fast things and I have four tattoos. This is who I'm gonna be. "

No need to guess really. I think those of us living on the continent of North America have become all too familiar with the douchtastic utterances of the poster boy for midlife crises. This is just another one of his jems I happened upon while browsing Jez. see post HERE

As one clever commenter remarked: "Denial is not just a river in Egypt, Jon."

My favourite part of the video from that post: When Jon addresses one of his daughters as "Hey tan girl..."

ohhhh jonny boy. for any other father I might let this slip as an endearing remark on the golden brown tone of her skin after holiday - not a quick cover for an oft repeated inner dialogue that probably goes something like this:

dum dee dum ... taking suitcase out of trunk - phew that is heavy - mental note: reward self with beer later

okay, kid 1 getting out of the car - shiz which one's this now? mmmm??? eff.

okay jon, think fast, what would Christian Audigier do? WWCAD?!?!? okay play it cool - play it cool...

"Hey! TAN Girl!"

phew - that was a close one - mental note: consult children face-name chart after beer.

And WOAH! He's only 32? hollllllyyyyy shiz - He needs to go on that awful TLC show 10 years younger... stat.

True Garbage, more like

So I watched True Blood last night. *Hands on hips/furrowed brow* What the hell was that?!? I have been praising this show from the beginning, but this season has been exceptionally underwhelming. NOTHING HAPPENED - AGAIN! pfft. I am sick of them dragging out boringness and I am soooooo sick os Sookie. Worst leading woman in the history of HBO - In the name of all things holy please get ON with the Marianne story line and get back to regular old vampiric debauchery ... thank you. Sincerely a loving fan. Hey maybe if I actually send them a 'disappointed/irate' letter they'll send me first season DVDs. Hey, it worked with Williams Coffee Pub, it might work with HBO, no?

P.S. more Lafayette and Jessica, stat.

21 Accents

Oh how fancy! 21 different accents all by one lady. I do take issue with the accent supposedly from Toronto - I know of no one who speaks that way in the GTA. Maybe if you head up north in Ontario, or to rural Alberta, or more likely the East Coast you'll have better luck ... which conveniently reminds me of a topic that I forgot to blog about months ago:

The Week the Women Went on CBC was a reality/documentary that aired on CBC last year and the year before that, I believe. And it is pretty great. I've not lived in small town Canada, but I can confidently say I don't want to given the examples of domestic life this show presents... have a look see for yourself: http://www.cbc.ca/thewomenwent/

He's from Belgium, Not France

"Hercule Poirot. The greatest detective of all." ~ Vicky Smith

"Agreed" ~ Me

from: http://www.vickysmithisnice.co.uk

Random Thought

Is it just me or is there an abnorally high number of baby-themed blogs? Not on the topic of babies in general, but on a specific baby. Every time I click "Next Blog" (which is not that often because I'm pretty self-important and prefer my blog and my friends' blogs to any others =D) either a blog from South America, which I can't understand and therefore hate OR a blog about someone's newborn pops up... It's a baby ... big deal. If my baby was like the Evian babies then maybe, just maybe, I'd devote a whole blog to them ....

See the Evian Babies Here and Here, but remember that everytime you drink bottled water you KILL the EARTH.

Britain's Got Hilarious Talent

My Dad sent this to me via email a couple days ago and it's still making me giggle. I was definitely enthralled with Riverdance and Lord of the Dance when it was popular (when was that? mid 90s?). I thought it was the coolest thing ... still do a little. Anyway, this is a brilliant comedic act, if anything, from this season's BGT (Um why was there not as big hoopla worldwide for these guys as there was for Ms. Susan Boyle?!) This Father-son duo clearly had the most fun of all constestants. Now that the show is over and SuBo hysteria has calmed down I think I can safely say ... I didn't really like her much - I didn't hate her, she just didn't charm me like she did the rest of the civilized world I suppose.